Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Spring Has Sprung!

The sun finally came out today, timely with Spring just arriving a few days ago. In addition to the warmer weather, the birds chirping and the flowers beginning to pop up through the topsoil, my continuing blooming personal life is also stretching upwards toward the sun. This upcoming weekend brings on a milestone in any relationship - the traditional "holiday meeting of the boyfriend". Easter is this weekend and he is coming to dinner at my parents home. As he said, "The pressure is on!".

My family is far from religious so this dinner is more of a gathering of our busy siblings and their better halves, and children. With all of our responsibilities at our various careers, it's virtually impossible to lasso the herd, and the intermittent holidays seem to tweak our instincts to return home, like salmon returning to their creek to spawn. I decided, since my man has no family out west, that he might enjoy the warmth in his belly of a home cooked meal and the hilarity of our eccentric family. Perhaps it will give him some insight into my character and background; better yet, faces to the people I speak of regularly.

My father and stepmother have hinted for years about my lack of love life, and I'm somewhat excited about the chance for them to meet him. I have always wanted them to be at ease with my path, which ever direction, and with this relationship addition to my life, and the ease at which it came along, I hope it will bring some confidence and relief in the back of their minds. I don't particularly make my decisions consciously regarding my partner, and whether he will make my family happy, but I must say that my new man may fulfill all of their desires for me.

The season has the signs of change in other ways. I have my mind filling with plans in the summer: beaches, getaways, camping, etc, thanks to this new guy popping hints and questions. He wants to book a camping spot, an exciting adventure for me as I have never been camping. I have gone house boating but no actual "tent-n-sleeping bag" excursions in the wild. I was a frequent sleepwalker as a child and wasn't allowed to go camping, for fear I would walk off into the night. I also have been focusing on spring cleaning, where clearing out the unused trash and clutter in my apartment (and life) is taking up a bit of my time outside of work. Cat proofing my apartment windows and balcony seems to be the centre of the activity, saving my visually impaired and naive young fur-monkey from obvious death. There is a high probability my cat will try to jump on the balcony railing, not seeing how far her fall potentially could be from seven floors up. I don't want to repair my heart again, especially over a simple screen on my balcony for pet protection.

I did add a new mirror to my decor, four square tiles lined up to create a full length mirror. Now I will actually see what I am wearing fully, instead of seeing my wardrobe. We both installed this simple item together, after a rainy day in wandering through IKEA. Sometimes doing simple things bring out the best in relationships. We initially shopped in geeky computer stores for used computer items, ending up in the new couple's future planning paradise, full of Swedish furniture designs with strange names for such designs.

Spring is not my favorite of the seasons, although with the new outlook on my less than lonely future, I may have to rethink my adamant choice of Autumn being the best time of the year. It feels nice, like warm tea sliding down my throat, knowing there's someone to sleep next to once or twice a week.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

2 Months In

Well, it's the end of February and I'm officially in a relationship. It has been over 3 years since I've been tied down and I'm actually giddy. Somehow this man found me after 3 years. He disappeared when he moved to East Van, and he regrets not asking me out before he moved. I am blown away that he returned, like a cat that ran away, and now has returned to his home.

After dating him, before deciding to make it official, I realized that we have more in common than I ever did before, when we were bar buddies. From little trivial things like owning a cookoo clock and liking WWII planes, to having similar lifestyles and ideals, we are such and easy match. Two pieces of a puzzle that fit like a glove. Even when there is silence, we are comfortable.

I'm not even crossing my just works. Maybe 2016 and the year of the monkey is finally my year!!!!!

Sunday, January 10, 2016

Date Night

I have to admit, I haven't been on a date in very long time. Now, whether or not this was an actual date at first, I believe turned into one during the evening. Movie, dinner and drinks was the plan. I was excited, not only to see an old friend from the 'ole watering hole', but we were going to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens. I have been a Star Wars fan since I was 9 years old, and I know seeing this movie could be either awesome or disappointing, but at least going with him would give us less awkward moments of silence.

He is pretty shy but I remembered how he broke through his shell a bit when we hung out, so when we met up in the theatre, I was happy to see it wasn't awkward at all. He had reserved the perfect seats in the theatre via computer, giving us the ease of just walking in, picking up drinks and sitting without the seat search. Great small talk, some giggles over the 3D glasses and the lights went low. The reclining seats were comfortable but did make it a bit uncomfortable to have the traditional snuggle in the glowing lights from the screen. That put me at ease in a way, too soon for that anyways.

Avoiding laying out a full review of the movie here, I will say it was definitely a good discussion after you leave the theater, which is what we did once we were outside. A good thing as I didn't want to cause some negative reactions from exiting viewers on the escalators. While we searched for a restaurant that wasn't full, we talked about the movie, agreeing on most topics and laughing about our view of the movie from old eyes compared to the preteen eyes full of awe and wonder at the original episode released 39 years before.

We decided on Indian food, a good choice as I haven't eaten this type of food for at least a decade. He loves hot spicy food, where I am not a fan but I knew I could order something there to my spice tolerance. The restaurant was very quiet, easy to talk, and we did, about everything. I asked if he missed the West End, as he moved east 4 years ago.
He told me his New Years resolution - to mingle more at work, especially at lunch, rather than eat in his office. This showed me he even recognizes he is shy. After dinner, which I paid, to even up the financial spending and hopefully the uncomfortable moment at cheque time, we walked down to the bar, where we would feel at ease, with familiar faces and places around us. We fiddled with his mobile phone to make it work better, and giggled at the dancer, as it was the weekly disco night event. It got really busy so he suggested we go somewhere quieter and I agreed. Off to another pub, which wasn't great and then to another, we talked more about our jobs, our outdoor activities, my pet, etc.

Finally, it was time to go, so he and I walked up to my apartment building. As ingrained in everyone, the pregnant pause at the door turned in to a nice hug. He probably would have kissed me even on the cheek if he wasn't so shy. I said that we should get together again and he agreed. Hopefully, we do, as the first date is always weird. Now that we are relaxed around each other, we can have more fun next time. I hope it happens.

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And just a little update.... Another date is in the works ;).....

Saturday, January 2, 2016

New Years Day - Eyes Wide Open.

My eyes, blurry from the festivities of the previous evening, squinted at the blinding light shining through my bedroom window. A faint purring could be heard behind me as my fluffy cat slept peacefully. It's a new year, 2016, and my first thought was of coffee. Once I stirred, BeBe, my newest edition of my furry companion collection, was sitting up starting at me with her crooked marble blue eyes. She no doubt had been waiting all morning for her breakfast and was purring waiting for my two feet to hit the ground.

The plan today was to watch the new year revellers jump into the chilly water for the annual polar bear swim. Then head into the bar and cheer in the new year with my friends. As I sipped my coffee I smiled at the memory of the past 2 weeks off. I focused not on trying to buy the perfect gifts, rushing all over town in a chaotic mess. This year I promised myself it's not about what you give but the giving itself. I have been blessed this year with many great things - new work, new friends, new accomplishments, new confidence - all received most likely from giving more than taking in my life.

Santa may not be a tangible person, sliding down chimneys and leaving gifts for everyone who was good that year, but that giving spirit can be in everyone if they let it. I had a quiet Christmas but ensured I made a visit to the friends working that day, with cute hand made gifts. I had Christmas dinner with a friend who's children and extended family are spread literally all over the world. I played board games with my family on Boxing Day, completely forgetting the need for gifts, laughing until my stomach hurt. I paid for other's bar bills and grocery bills, feeling like Santa Claus every time I gave selflessly. This is what Christmas is all about.

Now, as I sip my coffee, I realize my vacation is almost over and I only have a few days left to enjoy the silence. I watched the hummingbird that practically lives on my balcony, perched in the ficus plant, protecting his feeders from other jewel coloured hummingbird attempting to share the sugary syrup. I enjoyed seeing bald eagles dive for prey, unfortunate ducks plucked from the water, while walking around the seawall. Savoured the delicious sushi I had been missing and the brisk winter air while strolling around Lost Lagoon. It has been a very relaxing, time off from work.

Watching movies from my couch was ideal on this foggy day, which distracted me from my plans. I thought about some resolutions I never make, as the plots of the rom-com movies played out on the screen. The one thing I need to do more than anything this year... make myself available more, especially in the romance department. A friend said to me one day, while we spoke of being alone, that I choose to be single. This is true in some ways, as I have had moments in the last year where I could have turned another corner and romance would be there. I also believe I didn't select that route because I needed to focus on being comfortable with myself. I took offense to this comment in a small way but agreed also. This year will be different.

My phone blinked and the "ding" of the text just received shook me out of my reverie. It was another friend summoning me out as there was an old pal at the bar I needed to see. So I threw on my shoes, wearing a yoga-like sporty outfit, comfy and warm. I walked into the bar where there was the usual suspects with drunken smiles painted on their faces, from the beverages strewn about the bar top. A chair was open, so I sat down sober, compared to the dizzying noise and laughter of the woozy patrons. I looked around for this old friend for whom I was summoned down. He was at the end of the bar and I waved when he glanced around. Immediately he jumped off his stool and walked over to me. We passed the obvious pleasantries, hugging, and shared a few awkward moments of silence and he persisted in the chatter rather than sit back down in his seat. I was pleasantly surprised and realized that this could be a fork in the road with another choice to be made. Which route shall it be?

As the late afternoon turned into evening, I told him we should do this again and he agreed, exchanging mobile numbers. He was taking a cab home (he had moved from the West End to East Vancouver) so I gave him a hug good night. I said I hoped we can do this again soon.

Hopefully this will be a good year.

Happy New Year!